May Misconceptions: the “EVIL” Stepmother

 This post is personal and surely hits home for me. If you’re familiar with my other blogs, then you know that I’m a  step parent and I also have my own biological children. Blending my family has been pleasurable but it hasn’t come without bumps in the road. As much as I wish these bumps may come from actual issues my family are dealing with, they instead come from mainstream media’s influence over what people assume step parenting must be like. It’s assumed you’re a jealous, hateful person that wants to wreck havoc on the child’s relationship with their biological parent or you’re trying to steal the biological parent away from the child. I’m having to reset my thoughts and go back to the drawing board for ways to beat out propaganda. It’s important to me that I have a close knit family so it’s difficult when my role is pre-determined as a villain. The media doesn’t portray the step parent that’s supportive of the biological parents or the step parent that encourages the children to maintain healthy relationships with their biological parents. You never see step parents portrayed as loving and team players. There’s always the narrative that you must be in a constant competition with a biological parent and trying to replace them. It’s never seen as a person giving 100% effort to step-parenting for the betterment of your step kids. The worse misconception of step parenting above all else is the assumption that if your step child isn’t your biggest fan then you had to do something wrong or are doing something wrong. Children are individuals and they have their own reasons for being overly close to step parents. Some children come out years later as adults acknowledging that they had okay step parents but they didn’t want a step parent or at the time didn’t like the rules in place but see how they helped them in adulthood. There’s also more stories out there about step children growing close to step parents once older because they didn’t have the pressure on them of upsetting their biological parents for enjoying their relationship with this other person. I don’t want this to be too long, but these are some of the misconceptions I feel surround step parenting.

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